Logistics
How do we do the service without prayer books?
Rabbi Elyssa will customize a service booklet for you. This will have all the prayers that are read that morning. You can either print the pdf yourself or have it done for a printing fee.
How does photography work?
While photographers are allowed, I ask that they be non-intrusive. They are welcome to take photos at key moments, but certainly not throughout the service as that would disrupt the service leaders, including the b’nai mitzvah student. Attendees will be asked not to take photos during the service. They will have plenty of time to do so following the service itself.
Can family members participate?
There are a few prayers that family members can be given as honors. As well as aliyot when the students reads from the Torah. This can be given to grandparents, aunts/uncles, cousins, family friends. It is up to you if you want their hebrew names used, but in order to properly call them to Torah Rabbi Elyssa needs their hebrew names provided.
What if little kids are present?
If you are expecting a large number of children it may be a good idea to delegate a service attendee or hire a babysitter to set up space and have activities for young kids to do while the service is happening. While it isn’t a problem at all for young children to be at services, they often cannot sit still for that long and may be happy with an additional place to channel their energy.
Do we need to order Kippot? How do we order Kippot?
If you want to rent them from Rabbi Elyssa, please let me know! I’m happy to provide black suede kippot for $50 for use during your event.
While this is not necessary, it is a sign of respect for the religious tradition to cover one’s head when partaking in services to honor and show humility to G-d. If this is something you would like to purchase. There are a number of sites that do this.
What is a B’nai Kehiliah and how do I know if this is a good option for my family?
For different reasons a B’nai mitzvah may not be the right choice for a certain student or family. This service acknowledges the many accomplishments the child has made towards adulthood and their presence in Jewish community. It names them as a B’nai (child of) Kehillah (community). This is a great choice for a child for whom reading Torah would be outside of their academic reach. This has been particularly successful with young adults on the neurodivergent spectrum. Together with your family and the Jewish educator we can craft a meaningful service that solidifies Jewish identity in a positive and meaningful way for the student.
How far in advance do I have to reserve a particular date?
A year is the best bet! Popular dates are reserved well in advance.
Where can the service take place? Does it have to be in a synagogue?
Services are generally held at the venue site. Whether that is a backyard ceremony, country club or outdoor park. If you want to rent a synagogue space, you will need to check on their availability and protocol surrounding the sanctuary.
What ritual items do I need to provide for the service?
Ritual items needed:
Kippot
Tallit (prayer shawl) for student
Challah/cover and cutting board
Family Kiddush cup (optional--or use Rabbi Elyssa’s)
Wine/Grape Juice (for ceremony)
Kiddush cups/wine for attendees (optional)
Logistic items needed:
2 Microphones (lapel/handheld with stands)
Service booklets
Torah reading table: 6’ rectangular
Tutoring
How does tutoring work?
Students will be matched with a virtual tutor for the duration of their B’nai Mitzvah experience. Depending on the student’s prior knowledge, they may begin studying the Hebrew alphabet and word decoding before learning Shabbat prayers and chanting from the Torah. The goal is to not only prepare students to lead their B’nai Mitzvah service, but also to help them create meaningful connections to Judaism and strengthen their own Jewish identity.
Sessions will occur virtually via Zoom or Facetime. All you need is a computer, tablet or smart phone and a stable high-speed internet connection. The tutor will provide all additional materials needed.
How much time does my child need to learn Hebrew?
There is no exact length of time a student needs to study Hebrew in order to be successful. Typically, a student with no prior experience will be able to learn to read Hebrew and lead their B’nai Mitzvah service in approximately 8-12 months. The length of time depends on their prior knowledge, pace they are comfortable learning at and amount of independent practice between sessions.
How often does my child meet with the tutor?
Students will typically meet once a week for an hour with the tutor. The student should also plan time between sessions to practice the material covered. Special arrangements will be made for children with learning challenges.
What are the associated fees?
Tutoring fees are calculated per hour and are prorated for any portion of an hour. All study materials will be provided at no cost from the tutor.
What does a personalized Jewish education look like?
Our tutors take the time to develop relationships with each student and discover their unique talents and needs. Sessions are created to reflect these individual qualities. Our education model is all about flexibility: flexibility with scheduling, student progression at a comfortable pace, as well as ensuring the material is relevant for each of our learners. The goal is to connect with Jewish identity in a meaningful way to each student. Our tutors use the student's strengths and interests to engage with their Judaism. This may look like a discussion and connection around cooking, sports, language or current events. Each student has a unique gift to offer our larger Jewish community! Our tutors help them access that spark and share their gift with all of us.